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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
emzzy97
prokopetz

Random Headcanon: That Federation vessels in Star Trek seem to experience bizarre malfunctions with such overwhelming frequency isn’t just an artefact of the television serial format. Rather, it’s because the Federation as a culture are a bunch of deranged hyper-neophiles, tooling around in ships packed full of beyond-cutting-edge tech they don’t really understand. Endlessly frustrating if you have to fight them, because they can pull an effectively unlimited number of bullshit space-magic countermeasures out of their arses - but they’re as likely as not to give themselves a lethal five-dimensional wedgie in the process. All those rampant holograms and warp core malfunctions and accidentally-traveling-back-in-time incidents? That doesn’t actually happen to anyone else; it’s literally just Federation vessels that go off the rails like that. And they do so on a fairly regular basis.

writebastard

So to everyone else in the galaxy, all humans are basically Doc Brown.

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prokopetz

Aliens who have seen the Back to the Future movies literally don’t realise that Doc Brown is meant to be funny. They’re just like “yes, that is exactly what all human scientists are like in my experience”.

roachpatrol

THE ONLY REASON SCOTTY IS CHIEF ENGINEER INSTEAD OF SOMEONE FROM A SPECIES WITH A HIGHER TECHNOLOGICAL APTITUDE IS BECAUSE EVERYONE FROM THOSE SPECIES TOOK ONE LOOK AT THE ENTERPRISE’S ENGINE ROOM AND RAN AWAY SCREAMING

roachpatrol

vulcan science academy: why do you need another warp core

humans: we’re going to plug two of them together and see if we go twice as fast

vsa: last time we gave you a warp core you threw it into a sun to see if the sun would go twice as fast

humans: hahaha yeah

humans: it did tho

vsa: IT EXPLODED

humans: it exploded twice as fast

froborr

I love this. Especially because of how well it plays with my headcanon that the Federation does so much better against the Borg than anyone else because beating the Borg with military tactics is nigh-impossible, but beating them with wacky superscience shenanigans works as long as they’re unique wacky superscience shenanigans.

megabeeprime

Yeah, I love this.

underscorex

Reminds me of the thing I wrote a while back about Humans in high fantasy realms - they’re basically Team Fuck It Hold My Beer I Got This.

Impulsive, passionate to a fault, the social structures they build to try and regulate this hotheadedness ironically creates even greater levels of sheer bull-headedness. Even their “cooler” heads take action in months or weeks.

All their great heroes of the past were impossibly rash by galactic standards. Humans Just Go With It, which is their great flaw but also their greatest strength.

roachpatrol

klingons: okay we don’t get it

vulcan science academy: get what

klingons: you vulcans are a bunch of stuffy prisses but you’re also tougher, stronger, and smarter than humans in every single way

klingons: why do you let them run your federation

vulcan science academy: look

vulcan science academy: this is a species where if you give them two warp cores they don’t do experiments on one and save the other for if the first one blows up

vulcan science academy: this is a species where if you give them two warp cores, they will ask for a third one, immediately plug all three into each other, punch a hole into an alternate universe where humans subscribe to an even more destructive ideological system, fight everyone in it because they’re offended by that, steal their warp cores, plug those together, punch their way back here, then try to turn a nearby sun into a torus because that was what their initial scientific experiment was for and they didn’t want to waste a trip. 

vulcan science academy: they did that last week. we have the write-up right here. it’s getting published in about six hundred scientific journals across two hundred different disciplines because of how many established theories their ridiculous little expedition has just called into question. also, they did turn that sun into a torus, and no one actually knows how. 

vulcan science academy: this is why we let them do whatever the hell they want. 

klingons: …. can we be a part of your federation

the-real-seebs

Come to think of it, I mean. Look at the “first human warp drive” thing in the movie. That was… Not how Vulcans would have done it.

dragon-in-a-fez

you know what the best evidence for this is? Deep Space 9 almost never broke down. minor malfunctions that irritated O’Brien to hell and back, sure, but almost none of the truly weird shit that befell Voyager and all the starships Enterprise. what was the weirdest malfunction DS9 ever had? the senior staff getting trapped as holosuite characters in Our Man Bashir, and that was because a human decided to just dump the transporter buffer into the station’s core memory and hope everything would work out somehow, which is a bit like swapping your computer’s hard drive out for a memory card from a PlayStation 2 and expecting to be able to play a game of Spyro the Dragon with your keyboard and mouse.

dragon-in-a-fez

you know what, I’m not done with this post. let’s talk about the Pegasus. the USS Fucking Pegasus, testbed for the first Starfleet cloaking device. here we have a handful of humans working in secret to develop a cloaking device in violation of a treaty with the Romulans. they’re playing catchup trying to develop a technology other species have had for a century. and what do they do? do they decide to duplicate a Romulan cloaking device precisely, just see if they can match what other species have? nope. they decide, hey, while we’re at it, while we’re building our very first one of these things, just to find out if this is possible, let’s see if we can make this thing phase us out of normal space so we can fly through planets while we’re invisible.

“but why” said the one Vulcan in the room.

“because that would fucking rule” said the humans, high-fiving each other and slamming cans of 24th-century Red Bull.

there must be like twenty different counselling groups for non-human engineering students at Starfleet Academy, and every week in every single one of them someone walks in and starts up with a story like “our assignment was to repair a phaser emitter and my one human classmate built a chronometric-flux toaster that toasts bread after you’ve eaten it.”

ciiriianan

Humans get mildly offended by the way they are presented in non-human media.

Like: “Guys, we totally wouldn’t do that!” But this always fails to get much traction, because the authors can always say: “You totally did.”

“That was ONE TIME.” 

There’s that movie where humans invented vaccines by just testing them on people. Or the one about those two humans who invented powered flight by crashing a bunch of prototypes. Or the one about electricity. 

And human historians go, “Oh, uh, this is historically accurate, but also kind of boring.” To which the producers respond: “How is doing THIS CRAZY THING boring????????”

There are entire serieses of horror movies where the premise is “We stopped paying attention to the human and ey found the technology.”

theotherguysride

reblog for new meta. 

RE that last line: McGuyver. 

deadcatwithaflamethrower

“MacGuyver” is the equivalent of Vulcan vintage human horror television.

roachpatrol

during orientation at a human college, vulcans are presented with a list of swear words. 

“what is the word ‘fuck’ for,” the innocent young vulcans want to know. “surely there are more logical intensity modifiers.”

“yeah, you’d think so,” say the weary, jaded vulcan professors. “you’d really fucking think so.”

there is a phrase in vulcan for ‘the particular moment you understand what the word ‘fuck’ is for’. 

thefingerfuckingfemalefury

This is why the Federation is the only organisation to ever stand a chance against the Borg

The Borg can adapt to the brilliant millitary strategies of the Romulan Star Empire, the Klingons and even the cold logical intellectual prowess of the vulcans

The Borg weren’t prepared for a starship captain to lure them into his 50′s noir detective holo-novel and then machine gun them to death with a weapon made out of hard light

thewolverina

This thread is amazing. Even as a baby star trek nerd that only really knows the new movies.

sniperct

“there is a phrase in vulcan for ‘the particular moment you understand what the word ‘fuck’ is for’.”

I just died

sandshrewvian

I lost my shit at “toasts your bread after you’ve eaten it”

randomingoftherandomness

Oh please please someone write this

fozmeadows

the best thing about this post is that the way it’s written - by multiple human authors getting over-excited about ridiculous, wonderful, impossible ideas that ought by rights to be terrifying - is itself proof that we’re like this

Source: prokopetz
starspangledpumpkin
fairycosmos

cant believe women are expected to like cook and birth entire children and be professional workers and fit a beauty standard. like i am not going to do any of that lol

tnbcaddict

Are we… are we not gonna talk about the grammar of this post… Are we all collectively ignore the lack of commas here or…

fairycosmos

can’t believe women are expected to be grammatically correct and know where to place a comma and make sense. like i am not doing to do any of that lol

thatfictionalgal

OP: makes a valid point and observation on women’s roles in first world societies

Commentator: b-b-but the grammar!

ifshehadwings

I believe the specific issue was the phrase “cook and birth entire children.” It’s true that many of the commas required by formal writing are not strictly necessary to understanding and can be eliminated in informal communication. However, occasionally the lack of certain punctuation can have uh… extremely unfortunate implications. Of course, you could still proceed without commas here, as long as “cook” is NOT THE FIRST THING ON THE LIST. 

lierdumoa

Yes, the order is totally wrong. You gotta birth the children first, THEN cook them. This is a terrible recipe.

Source: fairycosmos
starspangledpumpkin
dankmemeuniversity

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arcanenrok

The distinction:

Galaxy brain indicates intelligience of something (can go in either direction)

Pooh indicates level of refinement and/or pretentiousness

Red Eyes Guy indicates level of appeal to personal taste

asundergrowth

Galaxy brain: Logos

Pooh: Pathos

Eyes guy: Ethos

BUZZFEED PAY ME ROYALTIES

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BUZZFEED PAY ME ROYALTIES

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BUZZFEED PAY ME ROYALTIES

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BUZZFEED PAY ME ROYALTIES

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BUZZFEED PAY ME ROYALTIES

hey-its-capybara

always nice to see someone found their post embedded in a buzzfeed article and decided to make some bank

world-heritage-posts

world heritage post

Source: dankmemeuniversity
queers4years
baduhennasraven:
“baduhennasraven:
“skaldish:
“ densley3:
“ regicide1997:
“ densley3:
“ skaldish:
“If you see a narrative that implies white people have lost their pre-Christian heritage and can reclaim it through the brotherhood of Heathenry, then...
skaldish

If you see a narrative that implies white people have lost their pre-Christian heritage and can reclaim it through the brotherhood of Heathenry, then you might be dealing with a white supremacist narrative.

densley3

Hey, by the way, MIGHT is important here. My roommate worships that pantheon, and is about as anti-nazi as anyone I’ve ever met.

regicide1997

So does OP. Correct me if I’m wrong, OP, but I believe the emphasis here is the focus on whiteness and lost heritage, right?

densley3

Yeah, I just worry that it could be misconstrued into prejudice against them in general. And they get enough of that.

skaldish

Ah okay, so it took me a moment to see the confusion here and I definitely can clear it up. To start with, yes, I’m a Norse Pagan and Heathen myself, and I created this meme to show how white nationalist ideologies have made their way into Heathenry by parading around as pre-Christian Heathen values and motifs. Not everything in Heathenry is like this, but the things I picked for this meme are. Going down the list in no particular order:

  • The Black Sun symbol was created by a Nazi SS officer as a stand-in for the swastika. It’s not historical to the Norse people.
  • The term “Folkish” is the English word for Völkische which is derived from the Germanic ethno-nationalist movement of the same name. It doesn’t simply mean “ancestral practice.”
  • The term “Odinist” was created by Else Christensen to promote her incredibly race-based and racialist form of Heathenry. She brought it to the US and taught it to prison inmates. It’s not interchangeable with “Odinsperson.”
  • The “SS” runes, of course, stand for the Schutzstaffel or the Nazi protection squad.
  • Othala has been co-opted by racialist Heathens and is now recognized as a Hate symbol.
  • The rest of the phrases in the meme are all dogwhistle phrases that Folkish and Odinist Heathens use to signal their values.
  • The Nine Noble Virtues was created by the Asatru Folk Assembly, a Folkish Hate-Group.

So…if you’re getting shit for displaying the Black Sun or calling yourself “Folkish”, it’s not because people are mad at you for being Heathen, but because these specific concepts are white supremacist. And no, they can’t be reclaimed because many of them were never ours to begin with.

But the more we Heathens can differentiate between white supremacy and an authentic Heathen practice, the more we can educate other people about it.

Hopefully this clears things up a bit.

baduhennasraven

Reblogging because I did not know about the nine noble virtues…

baduhennasraven

@november-venom, here you are, a bit of a crash-course. Also check in the notes for updates

Source: skaldish
ravingsockmonkey
wolfsheims

Numb // Linkin Park 80s Remix

worldsgr8testgrandma

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Originally posted by prison-mikes-bandana

martinidog

I didn’t know how much I needed this until I heard it.

dr-peppermint

The original song is how depression felt at first, this version is how it feels now

supernovajazzy

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hollowedskin

@l-heure-du-the this is so VIOLENTLY your fucking aesthetic

cryoverkiltmilk

From “… nothing matters…” to “NOTHING MATTERS! :D”

silverybeing

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buminburr

holy cow

Source: wolfsheims
theanartist
iguanodonot

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so can we start hunting down white liberals now or what

adamtheredbeard

The full picture is even more heart breaking after you open the uncropped version. Just a heads-up, it’s rough

afronerdism

image

Nah let’s post it. Let’s feel it. Don’t look away.

2ndbirthday

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butch-bakugo

I notice alot of my followers on here skipping these posts just to mess with my lgbt ones, suspiciously the white popular ones.

Heres a not so friendly reminder, as an lgbt metis person, i dont give a single fuck what your blog is themed or if this is too painful for you to look at. Reblog this post. Reblog this post with the sources of the 751 children who were found.

Your compliance and silence as well as the compliance and silence of your ancestors is what allowed these schools to open and kill first nations children. The children of MY people.

Dont follow me if you cant reblog this post or the one with sources to your political blog or your most popular blog. Add trigger warnings if you must but if your political blog is only focused on the harms you personally face like being lgbt then you need to see some bigger pictures and stop being afraid of angering your racist mutural or actually saying some shit about racism. If you can reblog some antifa graphics or add blm to your bio to be a surface level ally, you can reblog some sources on the genocide first nations people faced and still face today.

They were CHILDREN.

They were murdered in cold blood.

Source: iguanodonot
prismatic-bell
kineticpenguin

image

What a funny way to say “cops blew up neighborhood”

smitethepatriarchy

It’s been really hilarious to watch the LAPD try to dodge any responsibility for this while the media tries desperately to help them by publishing the most confusing fucking headlines but what really happened is that the cops found and confiscated thousands of pounds of “illegal” fireworks in LA and then decided to take 10 pounds of that, call the press, and make a show of using their new expensive toy, the “total containment” truck that is supposed to be able to take explosions of up to 15 pounds.

So they took the 10 pounds of explosives and their toy truck to a poor Black neighborhood, got reporters there, stuck the explosives inside, and set them off intentionally instead of just defusing them like they did with the other 4,990 pounds of fireworks.

For some reason, likely because something went wrong with their truck which I bet cost the city a shit ton of money, the containment completely failed and the explosion destroyed cars, homes, and injured 17-19 people (I’ve seen different reports with different numbers), a couple of whom were in critical condition but it sounds like everyone survived.

The LAPD then had the audacity to tweet that they didn’t know what caused the explosion when it was them who caused the explosion, intentionally, and we know because they called the media so that everybody could see them do it.

In summary, the LAPD wanted to show off/justify their ridiculous budget but their expensive toy was a dud and so they ended up bombing a poor Black neighborhood (because they would never risk this in a white neighborhood) and don’t want to admit it.

Source: paxamericana
nudityandnerdery
memeclassheroes

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ninjapancake314

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schrodingers-blursed-kitty

@mama-germany

apollonkondric

Move in together. Problem solved

broadwaytheanimatedseries

That witch hasn’t said a single word but im calling it now - Himbo.

Also yes move in together, platonically or romantically doesn’t matter, I’d watch the hell out of that wlw mlm solidarity fantasy sitcom anyway.

susiephone

A fair maiden knocks on the goth lady’s door and says she’s here to find love.

The goth sighs, points across the road and says, “Witch is over there. He doesn’t do love potions because consent but he might be able to make you prettier, although 90% of the time it turns out the spell didn’t do anything but make you more confident.”

The maiden blushes and sheepishly explains that she knows he’s the witch, she just talked to him and he sent her over here.

Goth looks over her shoulder to see the himbo witch standing outside his house giving her a grin and a double thumbs up.

mauzymorn

YES TO ALL OF THIS

Source: memeclassheroes
linguisten
somecunttookmyurl

there is a tendency with history, i think, because we're so far removed from it, to kind of forget that all of the people were people

a child 10,000 years ago left a handprint on a wall. they were fingerpainting. a viking climbs up a rock just to carve the words "this is very high" 10ft off the ground. somebody centuries... milennia... ago burned their dinner so thoroughly that they buried the ruined pot in the backyard rather than attempt to clean it. shakespeare got drunk and wrote dick jokes. tutankhamun was a little boy who liked ducks more than anything. a roman carves his name into a monument in another country saying "i was here". a prisoner, centuries ago, in the tower of london scratches lines into the wall as a tally marking the days. a medieval monk scrawls in the margins bemoaning the boredom of his work.

every human being across history has said "i was here. i lived. i loved. i made something. i laughed. i cried. please do not forget me"

Source: somecunttookmyurl